Answering my own question in case someone has the same problem some day.

I've had a lot of suggestions from people I took this to, online and off, and everyone had a different answer!

I took it to a structural engineer who thought my design would be fine structurally, and pointed out that since it's only a 40psf floor I can get away with 3/4" T&G.

Turns out I have a retired acoustic engineer among my in-laws, he suggests that I should hang the drywall between the joists on resilient channel for maximum noise reduction. That's a lot more work and would require sealing the drywall with acoustic sealant along the edges. That does have the advantage of being resilient to the frame shrinking a bit over time, and gives a bit more room for wiring.